Rhapsodic

Scene: Sibling and me while watching X-Men

Me: So what would you do if I was a mutant?
Sibling: I'd probably be insanely jealous and try to kill you to figure out the secret behind your powers.
Me: What?! I don't think you'd be a sensitive character, in a movie audience context!
Sibling: Hey, don't blame me. I'd be totally excited. I'd cut off the top of your head and then go, "Hmmm... what does Sylar do next? Try to remember try to remember!" They never actually show that bit, do they? Sad.

__________
Scene: Random conversation over Shani and Twistos with Asif

Me: She sounds interesting. What’s she like?
Asif: Partly hot, partly smart.
Me: Oooh okay! You know, that’s fairly common with girls, but you rarely see guys who are partly hot and partly smart.
Asif: You rarely see guys with a hot party smell?
Me: …

__________
Scene: After I gave Sharon the wrong television airing time for the Miss Kerala beauty pageant.

Sharon: No Miss Kerala on Asianet! Mother inconsolable.

__________
Scene: While telling Ciby about the National Aptitude Test for Architecture, in India

Me: Man, in some ways, the FE exam was easier to prep for and DO! Look at the sample questions:

1. From a balcony of your fourth floor apartment you are looking at a small place of worship surrounded by a garden. Depict the scenario on a busy sunny day. Use an appropriate pencil as a medium.
2. Using in desired numbers, the basic geometric shapes found in a bicycle, make a visually appealing composition without overlapping the pieces and colour it using three colours in a medium of your choice.

Ciby: The first question is pretty straightforward. The second question is well... I knew I should have tried something like that every time I crashed my bike. I did give it a try though:

Me: I am SO blogging about this.

__________
Scene: Overseas homosexual friend discussing his suspicious lack of sex drive

Me: I suppose you’d do well with a frigid woman…
Friend: THIS IS BAD! I’m a disgrace to gays everywhere! I’m like a chick stuck in a gay man’s body!

__________
Scene: While driving around on an admittedly hazy day

Loony, Unnamed, Nonsensical Entity: Look, the moon looks sooo huge!
[dead silence, crickets chirping, owl hooting]
LUNE: That’s not the moon, is it?
Me: Nope, it’s the sun…

__________
Scene: In a car with four other people, discussing who has the worst handwriting amongst us.

Ciby: I don’t think I’ve seen my handwriting in years.
Me: You mean since university?
Ciby: No, long before that.
ALL: …

__________
Scene: I go to the living room at 10.30 pm and find mum, sibling and dog

Me: Where's dad?
Mum: Gone to bed.
Me: Already?
Mum: Yeah. I have the remote. *grins*

_________

Scene: Talking to Pravin, Sibling butting in.

Me[to Pravin, being rather sarcastic and apologizing for something I should not have been apologizing for]: I’m sorry, forgive me.
Sibling [yelling]: NO! You are NOT supposed to ask for forgiveness! When someone offends you, you're supposed to take his women as compensation! Haven't you read the Illiad?!"
Pravin: …
Me: I guess you owe me two womenses?
Pravin: Why two?
Me: Fine, I’ll take them all.
Pravin: Why all?
[Sibling whispers to me]
Me: Apparently, she requires a commission.

__________
Scene: Father finds a Belhasa Driving Institute Pamphlet slipped under our door.

Dad: Oh look, you only need to be 17 to get a bike license.
(Overseas readers: UAE residents need to be 18 before they can apply for a driving license for a car.)
50 something Mum[thoroughly excited]: Oh, that means I can apply!
Dad and me: ?!
Mum: I just turned 17! [silly grin]

__________
Scene: In the supermarket, after maneuvering around a guy standing motionless and reading a juice carton label.

Me: Ugh! Does he have to block half the aisle while he examines his package?!
Sibling: *giggle*
Me: ... That sounded wrong, right?